Non-Veg Adult smss

Ladies hostel caught Fire. It took 1 hour to bring the fire under control and another 3 hours to bring the firemen under control.
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Wife: If I sleep with your best friend what will be the first thought to come in your mind? Husband: that you are a lesbian.

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Why did they stop printing Pamela Anderson stamps in the U.S ???

Because the people started licking the wrong side!

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Girl to hungry boyfriend: If my right leg was afternoon meal & left leg evening meal what would you prefer?
Boyfriend: Eating between meals !!!!

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Nobody is ever satisfied, Poor men wish they were rich, Rich men wish they were handsome, Bachelors wish they were married & Married men wish they were Dead!

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How do you teach a girl maths? Add a bed, subtract her clothes, divide her legs, enter your square root, leave your solution and hope she doesn't multiply!

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Lady : "I want a good vibrator" Salesman: "Ma'am ! you may select one from our range that is displayed on that wall"

Lady : "O.K. I'll take that red one"

Salesman: "Sorry, that's our fire-extinguisher";

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A divorced Couple were contesting for possession of the child. The mother said: "I gave birth to him - he's mine"
The father said: "I put a coin in the pepsi machine and a can comes out - the pepsi belongs to me! not to the machine !!"

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A girl says to her boyfriend, "One kiss and I'll be yours forever."

The guy says 'thanks for the warning'

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A Husband Was Asked: "Do you talk to your wife after sex?"
He replied: "Depends, If I Can find a Phone"

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Definition of a Gynecologist: Someone who looks for problems where others look for pleasure!!!

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Man to wife on wedding night- "Are you sure I'm the first man you are sleeping with?'
"Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others!'